The Embarrassing Diary

To date or not to date.

That is a good question.

Hello everyone and welcome
to the Embarrassing Diary.

First of all I want to give a
huge shout out to Jonathan M.

Homer for letting us use his fantastic
music as an intro to the show.

He's an incredible artist.

And it's really amazing that there
are artists out there that they're

so talented and they're willing to
support each other's work for free.

Second of all, I want to give a
huge shout out to you guys because

last week we migrated on our website
and I was so shocked to see that

the first country that has listened
to us the most has been India.

I want to give a huge shout out
to my Indian friends out there.

Please, please, please send me a message.

I really want to get to know you better.

And, of course, a massive shout
out to our previous episode expert,

Chrysanthi, who has been an absolute
blast to work with, and I think

she will join us in the future.

Now, let's talk about some
embarrassing first dates.

Of course, I invited someone special again
this week, an old friend of mine who, once

I told him, let's talk about messy dating,
he said immediately, Yep, I'm your guy.

He is a stand up comedian, a
hilarious improviser, he has a

degree in music production, he
is a lead developer for NewYork.

nl, he has one business that
he is going to talk about, and

he is launching another one.

Ladies and gentlemen, James H.

Gordy.

Oh, my God, the episode is starting.

Hello to him.

Say,

James: Hey, Zoe, how are you doing?

. What are we going to talk about today?

. well, I was told we were talking
about dating fiascos well,

basically you said dating, going
wrong in you thought of me first

well..

Both of us have been married.

Yeah.

For some time now.

But I think we've had a
fair share with bad dating.

Yep.

, but first of all, I wanted to
ask you, how are you with dating?

Like, are you good at it?

Are you bad at it?

. When you say both
experiences about dating?

I would probably say that for most
people, I have been the bad date.

If you know what I mean?

. I Say that with a lot of humility,
looking back now and being happy with

how I've grown, but a more relationship
with dating I think was, and this is a

problem that I think I grew out of it.

It was never about the other person.

It was always a.

More about, I think.

What I wanted out of it.

So my relationship with it probably ever
definitely wasn't the healthiest, but.

Uh, understanding that
has, , helped me grow.

And I mean, Towards towards the end
before I found my wife, I found the

quality of my date's getting better
because I, you know, , but one thing I

did love about dates is showing up to
meet someone that you've never met before.

And it's almost.

Like a performance.

And you're almost choosing.

The funny thing is I would say that
a lot of people choose a character or

how they're going to be in everything.

And I think the best results from
dating come when you don't do that.

But yeah, for a lot of dating,
you're going into it almost like

here's what I'm going to do.

Here's how I'm going to be.

Here's what I'm going to say.

Yeah, a hundred percent is.

This performative, like I have a
list of skills that you can choose.

Yeah.

Like here are my values.

.
Yeah.

Yeah.

And speaking of dating steel
rebating, the subject of taping.

Yeah.

Uh, what do you think
about sharing the beer?

What do you think about that?

I, so this is.

I think men should pay for at
least the first three days.

And the reason why it's not a, it's
not like chivalry, it's not like a.

I'm not, , Like some alpha male
play or something like that.

It's just, have you seen
how much face cream costs.

I can roll out of bed most days
and still look close to my,

the best version of myself.

I'm not saying that's good,
but I'm saying I don't have

to do much efforts to present.

Well, And it's, I just.

Economically mentioned step up in the
opportunities they get, , to, to help.

Now.

I want to make it clear
pay on the first day.

It's very much, I think
a male woman thing.

I couldn't give advice.

Four.

In same-sex.

Yeah.

Absolutely.

Like, I promise you go, go and see
how much a tampon costs and then

look up the tax that you're paying
on that tampon and then told me

that you should split the bill.

No time for that, just
do, do the bare minimum.

Just make even because also, even if it's
a, even if it's a bad date, You still made

someone else's day better by doing that.

So, you know, that's amazing.

. I also think that we, women also should
indicate that at least show your wallet.

Like I at least show that.

You are also, you also want to offer.

Cause I don't like also the opposite
when I know girls are, they're like,

oh, I didn't even bring my wallet.

Cause.

Because the other person who's
going to pay, I'm like, no, no.

But, uh, yeah, I think it's
a, it's a hot topic nowadays.

Yeah, well, and that's, I know I also,
I think one thing that would help

with it too, the reason why we've
been talking about it is because

it could, the amount can be a lot.

It can be a big amount.

Sometimes.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

Also let's normalize checkpoints
and dates, like have one drink.

Within an hour, you probably have a good
vibe, a good idea, anywhere at the vibe.

And just, I'm not feeling it.

Okay, cool.

Like that would save a lot of time and
money as well, because then even if

you're splitting the bill, you're doing
it on two, uh, two beers or a cup of tea.

Yeah, . First of all, I think,
uh, you know, immediately feel if

you're lacking that the person.

Uh, and then he just gets a few,
I would say even minutes to just

understand if you're vibing.

So Dawn invite them for like a
whole celebration with 10 meals.

If you're clearly not.

If you don't want to be with them
or sleep with them or anything.

Yeah.

I don't know.

Yeah.

It's crazy.

There are exceptions of
generally about the vibe.

Yeah.

But one time I was on a date that I
would say we were two or three hours

in and it was, nah, it was okay.

Okay.

But she had a tattoo on her arm.

Uh, I recognize the lyrics from,
and, uh, The band was AFI, uh,

which is like an old punk band.

And the nineties and, um, the second
I said, oh, you've got an AFI tattoo.

Of I went from, I think,
clearly not interested to.

Okay, we're going, going back to mind.

And so sometimes, like it
is also generally Vive.

Yes.

But that sometimes there can be
a missing piece of context that

suddenly you didn't realize you
were on the same tracks, you know?

That's why it's good
to have multiple dates.

In quick ones, you don't need
to spend like three hours.

Cause sometimes also it feels like
a little bit like interviewing and

it feels a little bit artificial.

Like what do you do?

Where do you work?

Why didn't you break it from a breeze?

Yeah, yeah.

But what do you think about Tinder?

The app well, T that whatever Bumble,
whatever it is nowadays, I don't know.

. . I appreciate them because I've
met most of my partners through

them over the last 10 years.

. Um, I would say my two major, two
major ones I've met through the apps.

But the problematic as well.

For a lot, like.

I found a lot of women don't
realize that you can pay for tender.

For women.

You have unlimited, uh,
swipes and everything.

So you just go on there and yeah.

Yeah.

That is not what it's like for Matt.

For men, you get about 20.

I think these days, about
15 or 20 swipes a day.

No way.

Nope.

Len you have to pay it's about
15 euros or, uh, to unlock.

To unlock for the rest
of the day for 24 hours.

, the amounts used to change a lot
depending on what the community

was, but sometimes you could be
paying 40 or 50 euros for a month.

Just to have unlimited.

So not nothing else, not
the super likes or anything.

Just to swipe.

The swipe.

Wow.

And even then you could go the, and I
promise you can look up the data for this.

A lot of men.

Um, cause it's only like the top 2%
of men on Tinder that get the likes.

All the swipes and everything.

So a lot of men can pay for this and still
go a whole week without a single match.

Wow.

That's actually the majority,
It's a feedback loop.

If that's a swiping.

Is the thing you should do really?

Because you need to maximize your
output, but then everyone does it.

Yeah.

Which means it lowers the results.

And then everyone's paying
too, which makes it even worse.

You know, it's wild.

Somebody told me recently, a friend
of mine that they are also, I

don't know if it's still there.

They added a field there, which
is a little bit discriminated.

Like women, for instance, they
can say, I don't want to see men.

That for example, they have put
as their height, one point 60.

Yeah.

Which is highly discriminated for
like, my husband is a short man.

I love him.

But if I was on the, on the app, I
would never met him . I on the ones

that I get it, there is a taste, of
course you have, but I'm so scared

about the app because when I used to
use it just for a brief summer yeah.

What are some of my life?

I was like, , what if I declined someone
that could potentially be my soulmate?

Yep.

Just based on the picture.

'cause I feel like in real life, um,
if I would see someone, I like them

because of their vibe, their energy,
not necessarily for their looks.

Sometimes you see someone and you like.

It or the picture they wouldn't
look particularly attractive.

And then when you see them there, their
whole energy, the whole, I think, I feel

like I'm one of the least photogenic.

People like I, there isn't a picture.

I would happily show anyone.

Of me even, even at my best.

And I think.

Uh, I do a lot better
in real life than I do.

, there is also I thank you for saying that
for, because for men like me, that's very.

It's good for that
message to get out there.

Same because I'm an average girl nowadays.

They put filters on everything.

So somebody told me on Tinder.

I put also back, like we
talk about many years ago.

Okay.

I'm ashamed of it, but now
I'm not ashamed anymore.

And I put a filter on my face.

It didn't look exactly like it looked
like definitely a better version of me.

And then this guy was
like, let's meet now.

He was in Amsterdam.

And then I said, well, I was
just a bit scared, like meet now.

And then I told him, you
know, what do you wanna do?

You wanna exchange Instagram and
just see a little bit each other?

Just like I wanted to make sure
that he wasn't a serial killer.

And then he's on my real
pictures, how I actually looked.

And he said, no, I don't want to go
out with you because you're ugly.

Wow.

Yeah.

And I'm like, I've just the normal girl.

Like I have.

Yeah.

I'm sorry for that video, your standard.

I mean.

I mean your, I think it will gorgeous.

And you're smart.

You're smile as well.

Like I, someone that can wear who
they are and their face is just

amazing anyway, but you you're.

Great hair.

Great eyes.

That's amazing.

He's an idiot.

And I bet he's the kind of man that still
text tries texting it to am saying you up.

Yeah.

Two weeks later.

Oh, first of all, thank
you for the covenant.

Um, I'm fishing for compliments,
but yeah, this, this is indeed the

type of guy who says I'm downstairs.

Do you want to hook up
for like five minutes?

That's like, he, like,
he's doing you a favor.

Yeah.

Yeah.

Yeah.

I know.

I know lots of men like that.

Uh, that do act like that.

Yeah.

None of them are happy.

They are all so lonely.

I, there was an arm cause I used
to do, um, Stand up comedy in the

London, amateur socket for awhile.

Which is something I still want to
go back to once I got through the

bumps of my own life, but I knew there
was a couple of comedians that had

the reputation for being like that.

But I also know that one
of them had gone back.

And the taxi because he happened
to be going the same way as my

friend he'd come back in a taxi.

And basically he was saying
to her, like, I'm so lonely.

Can I just come in and can we just
cuddle on your couch for a bit?

And he's like, it's not sex.

I just, I just, I need to feel.

You know, so like a lot of these men.

I like that.

Ah, so the opposite of
how they, they think.

And so I wouldn't add.

They think less of themselves than you do.

Already, you know, there's
really powerful, but that you're

saying, cause I have a lot of
friends and I used to be as well.

One of, uh, Those girls that we
were like, I feel like, um, A lot

of men out there that look hot,
beautiful, you know, very, very like

the attractive, the best of the best.

And then they're complete assholes.

And then in the end, what.

What it is.

They are, there is a small child that
needs actually love, and they just

don't know how to express it because of.

Many reasons which we got
into the analyze, of course.

Uh, one thing with dating
that always is amazing.

When I look back.

Is how unable I was to read red flags.

Now, now I'm like a bull that I can see
red flags all in my life for everything,

but the stuff you mess when you're young
and inexperienced and things as well.

, But also, you're not aware that
you're the one causing the red

flags a lot of the time too.

There's a really big red flag
to you don't even know that.

Oh, I know.

I am.

But there's already one.

Um, people, I think people pile
on to younger generations a lot.

Um, but one good thing I've seen
over the last few years as a

trend, talking about green flags.

So rather than stuff to
avoid stuff to go for that.

That I think is I like, I like that.

I like, what are some stuff to go?

What would you say?

Like with your experience expertise?

Oh, well, I mean, uh, my
expertise being a marriage.

That I have been able to lock down.

But, I mean, if I was
looking for green flags, um,

desperation I think is
something to always avoid.

Yeah.

So someone that is clearly present.

But at their own pace, they're
not anxious or anything.

And they're very, you
know, find a settled.

And someone that
generally, I think having.

Having a direction, whether that's
with a hobby or through their job.

Or something, having something that they.

Passion.

Yeah.

A passion that they think.

And quite critically, I think.

Are developing in it.

I studied music production.

I've met a lot of musicians.

But people that think they are done.

You know, they're already experts.

Someone that is always
seeking to be better.

Um, on the dates, you know, even
if they've got a PhD and something

talking about where they're going
next with, it shows a level of they

know who they are, what they know.

And where they're going with that.

Actually applies to everything in
life because it means that they have

humility and that they know themselves.

And like that's, I think is a really.

That's probably the best toll I
think you can have for any person.

It's just that they know.

What they don't know and what
they're going to do about it.

I always say that to my friends who are
still single and they tell me, oh, my.

I'm so sad because I've been there too.

Um, like, you know, That
person is on its way.

Sooner or later that person will be there.

If you want to have of course, a
long, a long term relationship.

Yeah.

. And I, um, one thing I think a
lot about with men and dating.

Because obviously you
being mad and having dated.

. And I think rejection gets up.

Bad stigma.

And I actually.

And good projection Sox.

Aye.

Aye.

Aye.

I've been rejected hundreds of times.

Um, and if there's one thing
I wish I could kind of correct

or learn or teach younger men.

Is that the rejection.

It probably means you need to do
some work on yourself as well.

Yeah.

And it's not that that person eats
two things at one, that person

wasn't the right person for you.

Like if you ever have to force something.

And anything with a person.

Then it wasn't meant
to be, and that's fine.

But also.

You could, but you might say, well,
what if that was the right person?

And I had 10,000 more in my bank
account and that's what I needed.

You know, I mentioned earlier about
the tattoo and stuff, the context.

And it's like, cool.

Well, the lesson here is to go
and sort that out the lesson

here is where the water will be.

You're responsible for making that F.

And I think.

On man.

That's.

I think it is important to really
put, because I feel like the male

role of things is to be a bit
more like, well, Just better, you

know, better for women, better for
themselves and take rejection as an

opportunity rather than, um, a defeat.

And I wish I'd learned that.

Uh, your mileage.

'cause I feel like also not only talking
about first dates, also relationships,

the way you, , break up shows a lot
of character, how you were, who you

were actually in that relationship.

Because if you were with someone for
two years, you spent a lot of beautiful

moments and then you decided to break
up and then you just go to that person.

Yeah.

That feels a lot about you.

. You have to be honest with a
person that happened to you.

It has happened to me.

Yes.

And somebody left the car, the continent.

And then, and they broke up.

Two years.

Not to you.

Okay.

But it was.

It was like WhatsApp some, some,
some months, but it was intense.

And, you know, it's harmful.

To the person who, um, is ghosted.

They don't know what happened.

Yeah.

Give them the chance to have a closure.

It's very important.

You don't even have to
have a huge conversation.

You can just say, look, I love you.

It was amazing what we had, but right
now, I think it's the time to move on and

I wish you all the best and that's it.

That's it, it doesn't have
to be something crazy.

And you would be amazed with how
many people don't even do that.

. , , I think it's a lack of bravery to
just men up and say, you know what?

It was good, but it's it's over
now, but thank you for everything.

Yeah.

You know, And I mean, that's
having been out of the dating

pool now for like three years.

Yeah.

I think that's probably the
hardest thing for me to get my.

And head around now is how is the game?

If, you know what I mean at
the gate of like, well, how

often is messaging too much?

How much is not?

And that.

People talk about.

People talk about Tinder and everything.

If anything like the apps kind of,
it gives you a bit more of a rule

set to play with and everything.

But when you kind of get past
that and you're like, okay, well

we've met and now we're gauging
the vibe and stuff like that.

That's actually the bit that
I miss, I do not miss at all.

Because that is so stressful
because you're one step between

finding, looking into a relationship
or, uh, harassing someone.

. . That's tricky and I
have no advice for that.

You know what.

In the there's this game
that you just met them?

, so let's say that we started dating
and you're not replying to my message.

And I see you're in line.

Yeah.

I feel like we, my girlfriends, we think
maybe something really bad happened to

him and that's why he's not replying.

So I will, and I'm understanding
I'm going to be patient.

Yep.

. And then you're like, what happened?

Oh, I just lost my leg or whatever.

They just make up this weird excuse.

And he like, oh,

reality.

They didn't see the message.

Immediately, they put it on unread.

And then they, like, I don't want to look
too available if I reply immediately.

. Like let's have a normal
adult conversation.

Let's reply on time when we see a message.

I'm not saying immediately, but when
you see just reply and be an adult and

have a proper conversation or have fun.

I think you will actually, I
think you, before I even said

that, I think you're right.

When you were like, just let someone know.

I do you think that might be the solution
to that, which is just, if you're not

basically, the only thing that needs
to happen is if you're not interested,

Let someone know is that simple is.

And also, I know, I know it sounds
there are scummier ways of doing it.

Blocking someone technically
is a way of doing that.

I know it's ghosting technically
because there's no answer, but if

the person's profile goes away and.

But it's just one tick after that.

They've sent you a message without sending
you, sending you a message and it sucks,

but that's still better than nothing.

Yes.

Yes.

Yes.

I told him you lost a
leg, like you just said,

,
..

, closing of this beautiful conversation
we can talk about also advises.

Did you have any good advice?

Uh, that you received about dating.

Uh, I mean, , in terms of
like what I've received.

I would just want to
share the two lessons.

I think I've learned
through my own experience.

which is the first light.

I would say.

The majority of my top 10 friends.

Or actually women that I've dated.

But didn't continue with romantically.

But I've met through dating, but because
I've been open to the connection.

It's transit transitioned
into something else.

And I think a lot of dating is seen
as this kind of like a, you either.

See them go with them and then that's it.

Or cut them off.

And just be open to you connected
with that person for a reason.

Um, the vibe doesn't always have
to be the end goal of everything.

And as a result of that, it's not
only who you meet, but we were

saying earlier about, um, Uh,
prejudice and filters on the app.

Right?

One of my partners was from Thailand.

And I think if I hadn't just been
open to what was available, I

wouldn't have ever looked for that.

And I'm really grateful I did
because it didn't just show me, uh,

her, her culture, but it showed me.

How to view my own culture
and things as well.

And then I've got, uh, a friend
of mine who's from Germany that

I met through dating and stuff.

And your world becomes richer for
the more people you have in it.

And a lot of these apps while they do
have the issues that the best way to meet

and connect with a lot of people that.

You will probably want to spend a lot of
your time with regardless of how they is.

So just be open to rejection.

Doesn't mean they often doesn't mean
that they want nothing to do with you.

It just means that that's not what
the relationship is going to be.

And you . You will become a better person.

And that's something I think
a lot of men need to hear.

Like I said earlier, projection
could be an opportunity.

And often the opportunity is finding the
relationship that was meant to be there.

Um, and, uh, I, there are so many
people I love because of that.

That's a, it's a good way to also
figure out who you are in a new city.

If you have a move.

But the other thing was, , I met my
wife when I kind of basically gave

up like, Uh, part of my advice is
just, is give up, but in a good way.

. I got diagnosed a couple
of years ago with ADHD.

And part of the CBT therapy I received.

Is accepting that things
can fail and that's okay.

And basically sometimes actually
things failing is what needs to

happen for the better life to rise up.

And I met my wife after I
stopped trying to present a

version of myself or present a.

A version of myself to get what
I thought I wanted from an app.

And I just put myself out there.

And I showed up to the date,
just not caring anymore.

And I don't mean in a depressive way.

It was the first time that I gave
up and I was like, there is no war.

There's no, nothing.

And, um, Two and a half years
later, you know, we're married,

we've, , moved country.

And everything together.

Like the best thing.

It's so cliche to say, be yourself.

But I think.

I think a better way to phrase that is.

Don't let anything come between
yourself and the other person.

Like you always yourself.

Everyone is always themselves, but
it's the wall we put up between us.

Yeah.

What we're think we're presenting.

And I know, obviously you said at
the beginning, it was a nice sort of

circle about it being a performance.

Just because you're yourself.

It doesn't mean it doesn't.

Isn't a performance to this
podcast is a good example.

This conversation is an example.

This is, , the, the version who I
am doing this and speaking this,

do the same for dating because I
think a lot of people don't realize.

How much they are.

Um, and to just see that in themselves
too, because the faster you learn

to love and accept yourself and
just present yourself as you are.

There you will find happiness and
find a partner, not just a partner.

A lot of people, or man, I should
say, say they want a partner.

You'll find the person who
is your partner, which is

such a early port as well.

Yeah.

. I can resonate with that
because, these worlds right now,

Especially with social media.

We want to present the best image
of as the best version of us.

And that's actually the
title of the podcast.

Embarrassing.

Like I feel like, , we don't
show this embarrassing side.

And it's embarrassing
side is the humane side.

Yeah.

That we all have inside of us,
even the most successful CEOs,

billionaires out there, They also
have that we all have doubts.

And, um, when I met my Biden I
focused on doing , a book challenge.

I wanted to read 50 books a year.

, and I started this, this, , challenge.

And then I met my husband and I told him,
I can't see you because I have to read.

And he's like, I can be
on the couch with you.

And I was like, no, I'm really
focusing on my project right now.

No.

And then in the end, the
minute that I didn't care.

Not that I didn't care about my
partner, but it didn't care of.

Being, um, to show off coy.

And I was focusing on myself.

Then that person recognized that and
said, Hey, I would love to be next to

you when you're doing your, your project.

And that's, that's the best, I
think advice indeed, when you lose.

, all of expectations and everything.

And also we shouldn't also
put the bar too high, right?

Yeah.

We expect Barbie and Ken to be out
there and we're not Barbie again.

And that that's fine because
that's w w this is such a thing.

There's no such thing
as perfection out there.

What I think what you said is
beautiful and I think it does.

They can be willing to be there and be
in your life while you do your things.

The other, I think a green flag that.

We were saying earlier, another green
flag is, if you say you're busy with

your own project to what you're doing.

And you're like, oh, I'm
busy for a couple of weeks.

Do you want to meet?

And at the end of the month and they
still be enthusiastic about that.

Being able to be enthusiastic
about the future that's.

Further away than a few days and hold
that in their mind and hold you that, and

just be willing to be there for the icon.

That's such a good sign that you can
say I'm doing my thing right now.

In a couple of weeks.

They're accepting who you are,
they're accepting your life like that.

I it's kind of crazy.

I think the best relationships you have.

When you don't need the
other person as well.

And, and, and obviously.

You do need them in lots of ways, but.

You, you as an individual,
you don't need them.

They're not responsible for your growth.

They're not critical for your growth.

Yeah, they do.

They will make you grow, but they.

You're not holding someone else hostage
for your own personal development anymore.

Yeah.

Wow.

That's so, so precious what you said.

Yes.

Yes.

I think so often we just want to be hard.

Um, which I think is also why podcasts
maybe taken off so much because

a lot of the conversations we.

See ourselves in them and that's why
they're, so they resonate more than.

And lots of other forms in that way.

So, yeah, and it's just, I just
wish everyone, anyone that is

listening to this, I hope that it
has been useful because I hope to do.

I wish I could go and
say all of this to my.

Yes.

The best.

It's not quite dating advice, but the
piece of advice I would give to myself

as a 15 year old, if I could now.

Um, is just go and do yoga or go
and do something, do something

that engages your body and mind.

And I know, uh, Lots of women that
go to those things and stuff too.

But it's not about that.

It's about going to a place
where you basically learn to

respect everyone who they are.

You get some kind of routine and you look
after yourself and do those three things.

And.

People will come.

You won't even need to go looking.

You won't need to look for naps.

Someone will come to you.

And you will, you will be the best
version of yourself like that.

I just wish I could tell myself
that like yoga or something similar.

Yeah.

Whatever you like something.

, something that has a kind of
community around community

and routine around it as well.

I think that's really, um, uh, web.

Everyone meets with some kind of
ideology that's exploring yourself.

Yeah.

Yeah.

.
. One thing, one worrying trend
I see constantly with a lot of

media now is media that says.

Your current identity is good enough.

You're good enough as you,
you know, you're good already.

And I really there's a few things
I've said in this conversation,

which is about being basically
willing to grow and still develop.

I do feel that's missing for
the reasons you just said from

a lot of, uh, thing things.

There should always be room in
the glass to fill in whether it's

our relationships or what we're
consuming, all the information.

Like if we came back and had this
conversation in a year's time, this

is, there is already a lot of things.

I think both of us have
learned and shared here.

In a years time, there's going to be more.

And if we pretended that
this is the drawing the line

under, we'd be undermining
everything we've said here too..

That's just what everything we're talking
about is so important because there

is such a holistic view of everything.

Everything is connected.

And I know that sounds very hippy
dippy, and also I'm sitting here in

a suit, so it's very contradictory.

You're saying that too,
but everything is holistic.

. But how you treat yourself as
how you treat everyone as well.

Yeah.

So I want to thank you for today, James.

I think.

I think it was a very
insightful conversation.

Before we wrap it up.

Do you want to tell us a little
bit about your current project?

What you're doing . Yeah.

Um, so firstly, I should say,
I, you said about social media.

I don't have any.

I actually deleted it
all before the pandemic.

Yeah to develop myself and to, for
a lot of the things we talked about.

So finding me is a
little tricky right now.

However, I've been
working on two companies.

Uh, one is a trading
card, a token business.

Um, we actually wanted to do erotic art.

Um, but we had issues with the payment
processes because of only fans and stuff.

So.

find a non erotic, safer
work things@atcgbling.com.

So if you want any custom playing
cards or trading cards, we can do that.

Um, and I have another project
which we are announcing in the

new year, , to help people with.

, Neurodivergent but hopefully we'll
help a lot of people as well, because.

I just, I don't think it's a
coincidence that when I found

the person that was right for me.

Based on all the lessons I learned.

But I was able to then make
businesses that reflected who I am.

Um, and so, um, right now, TCG
blink.com is where you can go for

one of my projects and the other one.

I'll let Zoe know.

So.

I can get mentioned in the new
year, but yeah, yeah, yeah, yeah.

Thank you for the opportunity for talking.

I really have loved this so much.

Me.

Thanks so much for being an
embarrassing dairy and people.

If you like James, and you want to
pilot to, and more conversation about

relationships or anything else that
you love, let us know in the comments.

And we're going to call James back.

Yeah.

I presented the best
version of myself today.

Next next time, I can
just get sloppy and messy.

Really embarrassing.

'cause I, I sound a lot
more put together than.

Um, if you pull up that
rock, there's a lot of bugs.

thanks so much, James.

Thank you.

Yep.

Whether you had a good
or bad dating experience.

I hope you enjoyed this episode.

If you want to be a guest or
you want to suggest a topic to

discuss next, send us an email at
the dot embarrassing dot diary.

dot com and a member from our team will
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we also have an Instagram account
where you can see all the latest

updates of the show and spicy
backstage footage that is for today.

Hope you enjoy your holidays
and see you next time.